34 Counts!

Donald Trump, convicted felon…

We know it's power for which he thirsts.

Craving attention, he's also managed

To earn for himself a number of firsts:

 

The first U.S. president

Impeached by the House, not once but twice!

(He always has to one-up himself.

For MOST presidents, just ONCE would suffice.)

 

The first former president

Tried and convicted on thirty-four counts!

(While ONE would be enough for most,

We know how much he loves AMOUNTS.)

 

The first convicted felon running

For the office of U.S. president!

(How many firsts can this man handle--

This New York/Florida resident?)

 

Our justice system is catching up

With Donald Trump, and it's about time.

For many years the man's been able

To get away with crime after crime.

 

But once again he'll play the martyr--

Especially now that he's been convicted--

Even though his constant troubles

And suffering are self-inflicted.

 

Thirty-four counts! But wait, for there

Are more indictments. Will there be

More convictions down the road?

We will have to wait and see.

-by Bob B (5-31-24)

Language Limericks

-Confusion-

Whether or not you seek glory,

Whenever you're writing a story,

You'll know on the double

That you're in big trouble

If you confuse "hoary"° with "whorey."

 

°definition: old and trite

 

-Grammar-

It's really quite shocking to me

When speakers of English can't see

What they convey

Whenever they

Use "him" when they ought to use "he."

 

-Subjunctive-

They say the subjunctive° is dying.

If I said, "Who cares?" I'd be lying.

If I were you,

I'd do what I do:

Perfect it! At least I'd keep trying.

 

°The subjunctive mood expresses wishes, suggestions, demands, or desires.

 

-Past Participle-

To another thing I must ask "Why?"

To the past participle, say "Bye!"

Why don't folks give a damn

When they say "We have swam,"

"He has ran," "I have drank"? My, oh, my!

 

-Past Perfect-

The past perfect tense I can tell

Can cause people problems as well.

Some folks abuse it;

Some just don't use it.

Use "had" with the past par…. Ah, hell!

-by Bob B (5-28-24)

Memorial Day 2024

Back in January this year,

Sergeant Kennedy Sanders was killed.

Today for all her dear loved ones,

The hole in their hearts remains unfilled.

 

Assigned to a military outpost

In Jordan, she and her team became

Targets of a drone attack.

Islamic terrorists were to blame.

 

Operation Inherent Resolve

Was a mission to combat hate--

The hate that's being perpetuated

By groups such as the Islamic State.

 

Rebuilding infrastructure was

Why the engineers were there.

The threat of danger was always something

For which the soldiers had to prepare.

 

Just one day prior to

The day that Kennedy met her end,

She and her mom had talked about

The kinds of Girl Scout cookies to send.

 

How sad! Because of fanaticism,

Countless innocent people have died.

Religious extremism proves to be

A giant thorn in humanity's side.

 

Unfortunately, the suffering

Is NOT just caused by militant groups.

Sometimes fanatic leaders cause grief

Through bombing raids and sending out troops.

 

Kennedy's friends and family

Will sadly but proudly make their way

To Kennedy's grave where they will leave

Flowers on this Memorial Day.

-by Bob B (5-27-24)

Dancing in the Nude

When growing up, I never had

The feeling that I was a finicky prude,

And even though it wasn't a custom

For us to parade around in the nude,

 

My easygoing Midwestern parents

Never felt that it would befoul

Our minds if after bathing they

Returned to their bedroom wrapped in a towel.

 

I learned, however, that some people were

In many respects less modest than others.

For instance, my friend's mother's behavior

Was very different from my mother's.

 

We'd be playing--my friend and I--

When all of a sudden his mom would prance

Into his room not wearing a thing,

Almost as though she was doing a dance.

 

It was…different, but not for me

A reason for laughing, fleeing, or fainting.

I was used to seeing scores

Of nudes in many a Renaissance painting.

 

Unfazed, my friend and I continued

To do whatever we were playing

As though we had merely witnessed his mom

Vacuuming, baking pies, or crocheting.

 

We humans are the only mammals

That stifle our belches, excuse our farts,

And feel that it's very necessary

To cover up our private parts--

 

Unless you are a nudist, of course.

That, we know, is a different matter.

So, birthday suit or covered body?

I think I will stick with the latter.

 

I have been to nude beaches

Both in the States and overseas.

Instead of feeling liberated,

I felt a little bit ill at ease.

 

I do not find nudity

Offensive at all, so please take note:

If that's your thing, then be my guest

And do whatever floats your boat.

 

If "clothes make the man," as the saying goes,

Nudity levels the playing field.

But I feel more relaxed if certain

Body parts remain concealed.

-by Bob B (5-20-24)

Then and Now

I remember when I was a youth

How consoling it was to know

That I had little to worry about.

Ah, but that was long ago.

 

If, perchance, the roof had a leak,

Dad would be up there in a flash

To find the problem, and once he did,

Off to the hardware store he would dash.

 

Electrical trouble? He had it down.

Plumbing issues? No problem at all.

He examined the situations,

Addressing the problems large and small.

 

If my mom wanted a door

Moved from one wall to another,

My dad got out the sledgehammer.

Anything to please my mother.

 

Carpentry was not his thing.

That is where he came up short.

Intellectual creativity

Was his passion, his love, his forte.

 

My mom was super organized

And ready for any circumstance.

She handled the bills, managed the home,

And planned our meals weeks in advance.

 

Multi-talented she was!

She cooked and baked, knocked down fences,

Gardened, and kept us kids in line.

Discipline meant consequences.

 

She even managed to work for a store

As a bookkeeper. We always knew

That everything was under control,

Though we were far from well-to-do.

 

We kids all had our weekly chores,

Which we begrudgingly did, of course.

However, the way my folks made us feel

Safe and secure was a tour de force.

 

Life is very different now.

There's no way that I can repair

Leaky roofs, wiring, or plumbing.

I couldn't even on a dare.

 

I know how to call an electrician,

Plumber, roofer--anyone

To handle concerns at which I'm inept.

I want repairs correctly done.

 

But every so often I catch myself

Being at peace in my childhood room,

Thinking that all was well with the world

And having no thoughts of doom or gloom.

 

Young and naïve, all I knew

Was my little world, safe and secure.

Threats to that tranquility

Were imperceptible, obscure.

 

Little did I know at the time

That life for others wasn't so sweet,

That some lacked food and shelter and had

Difficulty making ends meet,

 

That some were caught in the middle of clashing

Armies, that innocent people were dying,

That people struggled for rights and freedom,

That life for some was horrifying.

 

Naïveté and complacency--

As comfortable as they might seem--

Can insulate us from world problems

As though we're living in a dream,

 

One from which we must awaken.

And when we do, we have to decide

Whether we'll work to better the world

Or stay in our comfy cocoon and hide.

-by Bob B (5-19-24)

Ned Kelly

(This poem can be sung to the melody of the old folk song "Tom Dooley.")

 

(chorus)

What did you want, Ned Kelly?°

What gave you grounds for hope?

Well, Ned, it can't be fun when

You're hanging from a rope.

 

Bushranger°° Harry Power…

Was he a loyal mate?

They say he was your mentor

Who led you to your fate.

 

Victims of persecution--

That's what you said you were.

Victims of your gang's horse theft

Would not at all concur.

 

Bush larrikins°°° were suspect.

Rather than get a job

You chose a different path when

You joined the Greta Mob.

 

Some say you were a hero

Who thought he was doing good.

You said the poor need justice;

You were their Robin Hood.

 

Others call you an outlaw,

Killer, and evil guy.

You killed with no compunction,

So you deserved to die.

 

(chorus)

What did you want, Ned Kelly?°

What gave you grounds for hope?

Well, Ned, it can't be fun when

You're hanging from a rope.

Your gang shot three policemen

Camped at Stringybark Creek.

Who then would put a stop to

Your game of hide and seek?

 

You murdered Aaron Sherritt;°°°°

You thought he was a snitch.

Maybe you learned your lesson:

Karma could be a bitch.

 

There at your final shootout

You lost your loyal friends.

Well, Ned, you learned that it was

Too late to make amends.

 

Right after you were sentenced,

Your judge made it his goal

To say he hoped that God would

Have mercy on your soul.

 

What he said didn't faze you.

You countered blow for blow.

You turned to him and said, "I'll

See you there where I go."

 

They led you to the gallows.

Different reporters said

What words you might have spoken

Before the rope fell, Ned.

 

(chorus)

What did you want, Ned Kelly?°

What gave you grounds for hope?

Well, Ned, it can't be fun when

You're hanging from a rope.

 

-by Bob B (5-16-24)

 

 

°Famous Australian outlaw (1854-1880)

°°Australians who took up "robbery under arms" and used the bush as their base

°°°Rowdies who defied social and political conventions

°°°°An associate of Ned Kelly's gang of outlaws