Grammar Rhymes: Who or Whom?

It certainly will not spell your doom

If you can't decide when to use "whom."

I always stay calm and never lose it

When folks aren't sure about how to use it.

 

I will attempt--for the duration--

To avoid a grammatical explanation.°

That will be hard--I must admit--

And if it gets too tricky, I'll quit.

 

"To whom it may concern" is easy

(Although to some the phrase sounds cheesy.)

Substitute "him"°° for "whom" and see

That "whom" is correct; we DON'T say "to he."

 

"He is a person who I believe

Will never, ever get a reprieve."

"Whom" here wouldn't fit the bill

Because the word "who" is the subject of "will."

 

"Whom did you see at the park today?"

If "I saw him" is the answer, okay,

Then "whom" is good, even though you

And others might STILL prefer to use "who."

 

“For whom did you bake the bread?” I ask.

“For him,” you answer. Easy task?

So, in that sentence, “whom” toes the line.

And if you make “for” the last word, fine.

 

“Who do you think deserves to win?”

"Whom" would be a problem therein,

For "who" must go with the verb "deserves."

A little knowledge can calm your nerves.

 

But how about "Whom did you see at the gym?"

If the answer is "I saw him,"

Then "whom" it is. But if you're confused,

Know that "who" is more often used.

 

"The guy whom I saw at the meeting last week

Spoke English, German, French, and Greek."

"I saw HIM at the meeting…" Voilà!

So "whom" works there. Got it? Hurrah!

 

Once you’ve got it, your next endeavor

Will be practicing who- and whomever.

It's up to you, but I'll say directly,

If we use "whom," let's use it correctly.

 

-by Bob B (7-24-22)

°I could talk about subjective and objective pronouns, but I'll leave that for later.

°°Of course, we could use "she/her" to test the pronouns, but "he/him" works well because of the final "m."

Obvious Culpability

What has happened before our eyes

Hasn't been a big surprise,

But puzzle pieces--bit by bit--

Have come together, and how they fit!

 

Eight broadcast hearings and we

Can see Trump's culpability

When violent thugs decided to storm

The Capitol--so true to form.

 

Trump didn't care that some were armed,

For he wasn't worried that he'd be harmed.

He riled up the mob that winter day

And sent it on its merry way

 

To the Capitol. Yes, even a noose

Was hung there as all hell broke loose.

Trump was watching the violent scene

On his giant TV screen.

 

For OVER THREE HOURS, the big man child

Let the violent mob run wild

While he did nothing--zero, zip--

To call it off. That's leadership?

 

Lives were threatened; lives were lost.

Damage was done; lines were crossed.

People pleaded, and yet it's known

That Trump just tweeted and talked on his phone.

 

In fact, as flames of violence grew higher,

He kept throwing fuel on the fire,

For he continued to incense

The mob, further endangering Pence.

 

And yet Trump seeks absolution

For thumbing his nose at the Constitution?

He should have to pay--amen!--

And NEVER hold an office again.

-by Bob B (7-22-22)

Welcome to Gilead*

Welcome, folks, to Gilead.

Sit down for a spell.

You are going to love it here.

Oh, yes, we can tell.

 

You have freedom to believe

What we dictate here.

If you are confused, don't worry;

We will make it clear.

 

You will know your place here. Yes,

There's no room for doubt.

Strict control to make things flow

Is what we care about.

 

Making your life miserable

Is easy for us to do

If you don’t behave the way

That we want you to.

 

Those who fail to follow rules--

Who are, let's say, too loose--

Will be introduced to our

Trusty hangman's noose.

 

But do not worry. You will love

NOT having to think.

Of course, all of that is done

For your own good. (Wink wink)

 

Majority opinions do not

Matter here at all.

Dissent and you will find yourselves

Hanging on our wall.

 

Religious choice in Gilead?

Yes, I'll clarify:

You can choose to believe our creed,

Or you can choose to die.

 

Women controlling their own bodies?

You know that's all rot.

For them to make their own decisions

Is just a liberal plot.

 

What? You want to leave now? Oops.

I see a problem there.

Now that you are here, you aren't

Going anywhere.

 

So, lesson one: I will speak

And you will follow suit.

It's very simple; repeat after me:

BLESSED BE THE FRUIT.

 

-by Bob B (7-20-22)

 

*The totalitarian society of THE HANDMAID'S TALE

The Ballad of Guy Reffitt

This is the tale of a felon.

Guy Reffitt is his name.

Aligned with the Three Percenters,°

He plays a dangerous game.

 

He had been planning a trip

To Washington, D.C.

It wasn't to tour the city;

It wasn’t a shopping spree.

 

On January 6

In 2021,

At the Capitol, Reffitt

Was present and armed with a gun.

 

He was also equipped

With zip ties and body armor.

This man from the state of Texas

Looked like quite the charmer!

 

There to "take the House"

Was Reffitt's insidious plan--

To "rip them out by their hair!"

What an upstanding man!

 

On multiple felony counts

Reffitt was later convicted--

On five to be specific.

That should have been predicted.

 

One count was for obstruction

Of justice. Reffitt got caught

Threatening two of his kids

By telling them "traitors get shot."

 

When Reffitt receives his sentence,

Let's hope that he gets no reprieve.

What other brutal attacks

Does the thug have up his sleeve?

 

Good luck now, Mr. Reffitt.

We hope you enjoy your stay

At a federal prison,

Learning that crime doesn't pay.

You'll have time to reflect on

Your stupid behavior that day.

 

-by Bob B (7-19-22)

°A far-right militia group

Grammar Rhymes for Kids (and Adults): Pronouns (2)

We are on a slippery slope

When people push the envelope

When speaking English. Look below,

And you'll see what I mean to show.

 

"Who has ever seen an elf?"

"Luna, Richard, and myself."

Hearing that, I wonder why

"Myself" is used instead of "I."

 

When "myself" is used that way,

People, much to my dismay,

Forget that "I" will do the trick

And think the word "myself" sounds slick.

 

"I SEE myself" makes perfect sense.

And "I MYSELF can do it." Hence,

Here's a thought that should be stressed:

Use "myself" where it's used best.

 

"Please inform my office aide

OR myself." Well, I'm afraid

That when I see or hear that, it

Causes me to have a fit.

 

Please replace "myself" with "me."

"Myself" does not belong there. See?

ONLY I am able to

Inform MYSELF--not they, not you.

 

"Please inform…me" is what's meant.

Again, some folks circumvent

What's right with that which I suspect

The feel sounds perfectly correct.

 

"Tom and myself were asked to lead."

That sounds very odd indeed,

For doesn't "myself" sound awkward to you

When a simple "I" would do?

When speakers are a bit confused,
Words can sometimes be misused.
The following examples might
Provide a sense of what sounds right:

 

"Help yourselves to lunch," we hear.

And "Do not let yourself show fear."

"She bought herself a brand new fan."

"He himself designed the plan."

 

Reflexive pronouns they are called--

Intensive, too, and I'm enthralled

When English speakers are aware

Of using pronouns with great care.

-by Bob B (7-13-22)

Grammar Rhymes for Kids (and Adults): Pronouns (1)

We—YOU and I—both know

That rain will make the flowers grow.

It also makes your windows blur;

MARISOL and I concur.

 

SHE and I have never seen

A dog whose fur was emerald green.

But if you see one here or there,

Please make HER and ME aware.

 

When SHE and WILLIAM went to swim,

The lifeguard rescued HER and HIM.

“Please don’t tell a soul!” said he.

"Keep it between YOU and ME."

 

William and I play soccer each day.

That’s the only sport we play.

Give both HIM and ME a break,

For winning’s not a piece of cake.

 

HE and I will sometimes win.

When not, we take it on the chin.

The other team is good, and thus,

It’s perfect for both THEM and US.

 

When THEY and WE play soccer games,

We don’t lose sight of our clear aims:

To do our best and have great fun.

But fun’s priority number one.

 

William, Marisol, and I,

Instead of aiming low, aim high.

Folks like THEM and ME profess

To always seek out happiness.

 

"You must dream big," we always say,

"And keep your doubts and fears at bay."

HE, SHE, and I will strive

To keep our goals and dreams alive.

 

But always, always be on guard.

For YOU and ME that can’t be hard.

If YOU and I both concentrate,

We can keep our pronouns straight.

-by Bob B (7-10-22)