In Praise of Cats

Dogs and cats can enhance our lives--

At least when we don't break out in hives,

Constantly sneeze and blow our nose,

And have to experience other woes.

Dogs are very demonstrative,

Quick to obey, and quick to forgive.

Cats, however, are more mysterious,

Less predictable, surely more serious.

It’s true that when a cat’s in heat,

The sounds she makes are far from sweet.

But rub your hand across her fur

And listen to her soothing purr.

Dogs insist on making their mark

By giving a loud, annoying bark.

They scare you with a threatening growl

And drive you crazy when they howl.

Of course, dogs can learn to shake

And sit--both a piece of cake.

They'll fetch, roll over, heel, and stay,

And try to do other things you say.

Cats will hear your every command

But ACT as though they don't understand.

They understand but find it stifling

When asked to do what they find trifling.

If you have a coffee table,

Tie things down if you are able.

Larger dogs will never fail

To knock things off with a wagging tail.

Cats will daintily tiptoe by

And not leave everything awry,

For cats have had much greater success

At demonstrating their finesse.

When dogs perchance let out a fart,

Your nose will crinkle, your eyes will smart.

Cats, however, have much more class;

You hardly know that they've passed gas.

When dogs are out to walk or play,

They'll poop and then just walk away.

With dirt or sand, cats construe

A way to cover up number two.

I have friends who say to me

That dogs make better company--

That dogs provide more dividends

Because they make much better friends.

But I say there should be no shame

If cats make calm restraint their aim.

And I choose friends who in no case

Would slobber on me and lick my face.

Dogs must always get a whiff

Of everything that they can sniff.

One wonders what's going on in their minds

When they smell one another's behinds.

Cats bring manners up a notch:

They don't walk up and sniff your crotch.

They're more subtle and wouldn't dare;

They display more savoir faire.

While dogs don't like to be alone,

Cats…well they do fine on their own.

Dogs out there should NOT be offended;

Any insults were unintended.

I must say I have no regrets

Discussing what I prefer in pets.

Surely, some of you think I'm nuts,

But I still prefer cats to mutts.

-by Bob B (1-27-20)